3 Lessons I Didn’t Ask for

On January 2019 I turned 27. It was a mixed feeling within, there were many questions that were unanswered and most unexperienced too. After these aspects dawned upon me I decided to dedicate this year for an exploration and learn lessons from it. 

Initially I didn’t know how to begin. I was confused, angry and failed to appreciate what I already had. I for once realised the value of what counting my blessings is and what it is to be grateful. It was already month of march, and I still didn’t know what to do. Then happened a sudden magic, or rather it was a quiet logic. I decided to workout and focus on my fitness.

I believed that, this was a good place to begin and progress on my exploration. Little did I know that I would barge into some interesting unasked lessons. My physical health was just an excuse for life to teach me these lessons. Following are 3 valuable lessons that changed my life.


It was all in my head. I was best at everything that I do. There were ready answers for everything that was asked. I was the only person right in the room. This feature in me was good for my ego, it filled me with all the self worth, confidence and pseudo self esteem that I could boost and wag about. But then came the harsh truth. My self built glass palace had no-one but just me.

Life is an absolute shit when we are alone. It is harsh, meaningless and mostly purposeless. Everything is just a hangover in the state of loneliness. Day starts with I and it ends with me. So, there I was figuring out me in my glass palace, which was about to break or rather breaking.

One day in my no-people kingdom came a mystic call of a far forgotten friend. Little did I know when I picked the call that this would teach me my first lesson. After usual dramatic concerns for each other, we spoke some intense stuff about ourselves. There were some questions he wanted clarity on. My profession did allow some objective answers for which he did find his peace. We bitched, (Yes Guys do Bitch), spoke some usual things and hung up the call too.

How did I learn my first lesson then? For one of the things that he asked, I made a very casual remark. I said “Bro, Humility is the key. Being humble creates abundance and all the prosperity we seek!” This was a casual remark, but this had gold coins drop in my head from heaven. This was the answer for my self-imposed, most screwing and literally nut-cracking loneliness and much more.

The whole concept of Humility and prosperity made sense to me and changed everything for me. I had the lesson but not enough humbleness to act. So, I furthered this discussion with one of my mentors. What he said made more sense and also seemed practical to imbibe. He just asked to prostrate to the floor every single day, first thing in the morning. Practicing it was simple and truly effective. This gave me the most valuable experience of Surrender through humility. This was just the beginning of everything that led to a beautiful lesson number 2.


Humility was a definite requirement in my life. I not only lacked it but I even believed that my reality was an absolute truth. Being absolute of anything for that matter kills the essence of that situation, phenomenon or that particular zone of reality. As I have mentioned before humility first led me to surrender. The only ugly truth about this amazing learning was, it made me surrender all that I had.

Yes, surrender has been the most difficult lesson that life initiated me into. This seems like a philosophical wisdom yet, I just can’t simplify this concept. Have I fully mastered this chapter of lessons? Absolutely not. The aspect to surrender taught me that there is nothing absolute because, I realised I am a Big Zero. Couple of months from there has just been a constant realisation of how little a knowledge I have gathered. This constantly keeps me aware of the fact that I have to sharpen my skills every single day. So more discipline in my life!

To surrender is to give up and give in. It is to give up what we have and give in to the EGO that is present in us. In fact past couple of months have been just a constant tug of war between myself and The EGO in me. Our ego rules us, builds us and moulds us. I am still figuring out these things, but this is more an experiential concept. So I am sharing it well in advance. Hope you get this and experience it. I am sure to write more just on surrender.

Now, how did I learn my second lesson?

The more I surrendered more empty I became. So one day, a line from Harry Potter Series came as a reminder. The line goes such “Help will always be given at Hogwarts to those who ask for it.” This changed the whole game for me. I am huge fan of Harry Potter and this definitely was my Elixir of life.

World became my Hogwarts and I was the one who was seeking help. Every time a character in Harry Potter surrendered to the magic of Hogwarts they found magic in themselves. This is true with life as well. So lesson number 2, “Ask and You shall receive”.

All I had to do was to just ask what I wanted and it did come to me. Funny it might seem but then, this actually happened. I had very little to loose and asking made me work towards it with a sense of completeness. This whole phase taught me faith, love, the power of belief and most importantly laid a pathway to Lesson number 3. A gentle reminder before I get to next section – At lesson number 2 I became a huge big fat Zero and ‘0’ is the most complete number amongst numerical numbers!


My exploration was going well and I was happier than before, more successful than before and I became a learner. I became a student of life. There was nothing that I wanted. I had reached a happy saturation point and thus, had made my reality again an absolute truth.

Every single time I have taken things for granted, there has been a new jolt that life wished to present me with. Yes, it comes like a jolt of a thunder bolt. Things stop happening and situations make life a horrible mess. But now, I am getting used to these phases of life. They have just made an exponential growth contribution to my life every single time I have hit them.

One morning, I woke up with a headache so intense that I just had to be on pills entire day. I took an off from my appointments and decided to rest. Headache was fine but I had an emotion of weird pain attached to it. Pain was in my heart, it felt heavy and soon transpired into a thought that I am not doing enough. One week from there was a constant juggle in my mind as to what I wasn’t doing enough. I tried to increase every action that I was involved in just for that to go in vain.

As this plight of mine continued I went back to lesson number 1 and just chose to surrender and leave it to the magic of earth. A day after this sheepish act of mine came a statement in my mind “I am not contributing enough to other fellow humans”. 

I do contribute as a therapist but, that wasn’t enough for my mind nor my body. But the realisation that it wasn’t enough was itself good for my body to let go of the pain. But then, mind did keep me engaged with the concept of contribution. And then came the most important lesson of all. A conversation with my mentor and I asked him “How can I Contribute more?” the one liner from him was enough. The line goes such “Just make a difference in any one beings life everyday – Make a difference – just contribute”. 

Can it be more simpler than this? NO. All I have done is to make a difference in any one beings life every single day. I just can’t say how beautiful it is. May it be my mom, cat, clients, others on road (even a simple smile to them), someone asking me for some help, and my dearest friends. All these have become important to me. There is a purpose in everything now. There is delightful satisfaction in everything.

Before you get bored. let me culminate this now…


I started it all with an exploration in my mind. It has been effectively 9 months of journey and it has literally been my rebirth. If I have to weave what I have learnt it goes like this.

Humility is a power that gives us the beautiful experience to surrender and thus Humility is the key to all the prosperity and knowledge. The more knowledge we gather, more empty we get. And it is a strange and soothing emptiness. In that emptiness all that we ask is given. Because, we are ready to handle it with no entitlement, with no ego for self. Soon we live and contribute for all the fellow beings in existence.

True essence of living is to give and make a difference in others life. We are not going to finish this race because this is not a race. This is a journey. A journey is best enjoyed when done together. Lessons fuel these journey and we need to take these lessons sincerely.

I just love the way last 9 months have been for me. These 9 months have taught me the 3 LESSONS I DIDN’T ASK FOR. 3 most valuable lessons. Hope this serves you in some way.

And lessons will just go on.


4 thoughts on “3 Lessons I Didn’t Ask for

  1. Ruchika Garg says:

    Beautifully written.. It’s great to see how you share your personal experiences and lessons learnt. It inspires us to reflect on our own lives in the same light and look at what we’ve learnt, even if we didn’t ask for the lessons (which truely does happen so often )
    You write with your heart, that’s the best part. Thanks for letting us be a part of this 🙂

  2. Lakshmi says:

    It’s so beautifully written Mukund, yes to seek and take in we need to be ready to take in for that there needs to be space ,that space comes only with knowledge,and this comes with surrender ,and surrender with humility…wow…

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